In Memory of Jeni . . .

Happy Tuesday morning everyone. By the way, it's good to be back in PA. I hope you all enjoyed Maile's posts over the weekend - if you didn't get a chance, make sure you check them out today.

Well, another weekend without television, and the world has not crumbled. So what did I do this weekend? I'm glad you asked - I went to West Palm Beach, Florida and hung out with some dear friends, Jim and Susan.

Jim has a daughter Jeni. She would be a little older than me. She lived in Washington State where she worked at a cancer research center and was the mother of two beautiful boys.

In the summer of 2002 Jim's daughter Jeni had finally reached the point that many do, and decided that she needed to get out of the abusive relationship she was in. Her two sons were 5 and 2. Not too long before, they had both ridden in the ambulance with her to the hospital after her husband kicked her in the face and broke her jaw.

Jeni began making preparations to leave. I think her husband must have found some evidence of her impending departure, so he confronted her one night as she was on her way out the door. We don't know exactly what happened at that point, but we do know that at least one of her two young sons was upstairs, awake, as her husband continued shouting, made his way into a side room, came back, pushed Jeni to the ground and shot her in the back of the head. She died instantly.

The man tried to clean up the mess he had created, rolled Jeni up in a carpet and put her in the garage, no doubt waiting for the right time to dispose of her body. A local store's security camera shows him, that night, going into the store with one of his young sons on his shoulder, buying some beer and hanging out as if nothing had happened.

Fortunately the police discovered Jeni. I won't go into the weeks and months that followed, or into the lengthy court case where the defense tried to trash Jeni so that the defendent's claim that she committed suicide would be believed. I won't describe in detail the feelings in the courthouse when he was handed a 25 year sentence.

What I do want to talk about is what we can do. First of all, think about spending an evening with friends . . . without turning on the tv. We don't do this enough. Jim, Suzy and I had such a great time, reflecting on their experience and remembering Jeni. It was a tv-less weekend, and I treasure the hours we shared.

Secondly, think of your friends and family today and thank God for each and every minute that you have with them. As too many have experienced during this holiday season, nothing is guaranteed. Our tickets can be punched at any time, so as you start off on this (cold) Tuesday morning, I challenge you to live this week like it's your last.

Finally, please please please think about your family and friends. Do you know someone traveling Jeni's road? Do you know someone in an abusive relationship? Have you wanted to say something for a long time but didn't want to appear nosy or irrational? A serious intervention may have been able to save Jeni's life. A warning from you might save your friend's life. Maybe, if you can't work up the nerve to confront them, you could just forward this post. It may make them stop and think.

It may keep them alive to enjoy another year.

See you tomorrow.